Life is a bitch:)

Heard that somewhere but tell you what, I don't think it is necessarily so. I am not being an optimist for a change here. Here, this is what I think, its when you are really feeling stupid or been ran over, that you generally tend to think so. And it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, like a logically illogical logic. Kind of absurd, kind of stupid but again terribly non-sense and useless, exactly like this blog of mine. :)

Am I jinxed?

I think I am jinxed. I used to have this superstition that if I really wanted something, something will happen and it might not happen. When I fall down and hurt my knee or sprain my angle, instead of thinking its fine its nothing, I used to think, O its a ligament tear or the bone is broken, fearing that if I am optimistic, I ll end up being screwed. :) But that was in the school as a kid. And I had long lost those feelings along with my innocence. But now I think I am on my way bak to being paranoid. Anybody there?

Biting point.

Biting point is that point where the engine actually starts moving the vehicle, ya kno thro the clutch transmission and all. Figuratively speakin its the point where things start moving. I was wondering today wat wud be the opposite of the same. My bike mechanic once told me that the Bullet is like old Ashok Leyland trucks : It will move and run, tho it mite complain thro jerks and funny sounds. Bt it will keep on running until all is gone. Its like it will stop on ya only wen it is dead. Then ya ll hav to drag it and breath life into it again. Funny isn't it?

Childhood Longings.

Was reading this book called The Norwegian Wood by Haruki Murakami. Somewhere the protagonist speaks about childhood longings. It says bt those longings for things tat ya wanted as a child and was unable to get. The way they haunt you all your life and moulds your perspective. Funny when I thought bt it, coz I dont remember having any of those. Its nt because I got everything I wanted, now that wud definitely be untrue. Thankfully my parents were very sensible enough that wen they dont get me something, they would tell me why I dint get them and why shud it be so.

I don't really yearn for things, even if I do, I loose interest too fast. I am talkin abt materials, things here. Hmm, the last time I wanted something very badly was my camera. I saved some cash for that and bought it. I was very excited abt the same bt then once the initial excitement got over, it was all gone. :( So much for being materialistic rite? Mebbe I am too materialistic that once I get one thing, I immediately start yearning for the next. Mebbe I do have these yearnings bt since I am yearning for it all the time I am nt able to understand that. Mebbe I shud go to Himalayas and then stay there for sometime and then decide.  

P.S. :- The excitement about the camera came back to me pretty soon. :) I love photography, I own a pretty good camera. But that doesn't mean I am a good photographer or that I take good pictures. :)

Wow !!! Thats quite longer than I thot. :)

The HR needed a list of ma competencies, ya kno the conventional one. I thot why nt I make a more unconventional one based on the feedback I got from ma friends, from time to time. So here it goes :

1.  I can lie on your face, without flinching, without even a blink of my eye.
   Experience : Since time immemorial. Tho the last time I used this skill was quite a long time ago, I must say. And it gave very positive results, atleast from my perspective. Tho I haven't used it, I think I am not rusty yet.
   
   
2.  This shud be in direct speech - "When you are at your sarcastic best you can peel people." Came from a girl in the college, and not as a compliment tho. Mebbe becoz she was at the receiving end that time.
   
   
3.  I am very sly and I lack conscience. Now this was lil recent, maybe under an year. I kno that I am sly. Bt I always thot I had a bit of a conscience. Bt then your friends know ya better rite? As bt the sly part, if somebody found you sly, then they shud be more sly than you to kno that rite. :) Needn't be, now I know.
   
   
4.  I can vanish and cease to exist with nt even me knowin bt the same. This I had tried a long long back and it was shockin to me wen I found that I had disappeared. And, then, it was tough for me. So this is somethin I would not wanna do again.
   
   
5.  I can remember every single thing tat has happened and then look back and join the dots. I am good at this, and I am nt boasting. And to add to that, I pretty much instinctive and I trust them more than anything.
   
   
6.  I can see people. :) No, nt the dead ones. The real alive ones. I do see them, tho I tend to ignore them.
   
   
7.  If you think you have seen a guy with the biggest ego and attitude problems, send him to me. I have better and bigger ones.
   
   
8.  I am generally positive, bt I can generate lotsa negative energy about me and drive ppl away like one crazy extremely pungent fart.
   
   
9.  I can make ppl hate me. Pretty common skill these days, bt I thot I might mention it too.
   
   
10.  I think the word hypocrite was made with me in mind.
    
    
11.  I can be nice at times, bt don worry bt tat, I am nt usually. 
    

"Lorca eh? No. Neruda. No. Who? I dont remember."

"I used to listen the bare feet splashing in the ship

And had a feeling of the faces darkened by hunger
My heart was a pendulum between her and the street
I don't know with what strength I freed myself from her eyes,

I broke away from her arms
She was left clouding with tears her anguish

Behind the rain and the glass"

This piece of verse comes in the movie "The Motorcycle Diaries" after the scene where young Ernesto leaves his lover and moves to embark in his journey. Dunno where is it sourced from, bt it struck some chords.

How far ? How deep?

How far is far? How deep is deep?

Hmmm nice questions rite? Well lemme reframe them:

How far would you go? How deep would you dive?

Nicer, yet incomplete. Lets add more:

How far would you go for some one? How deep would you dive to find some thing?

Blah blah BS. Not yet, not yet.

How far would you go for some one you love? How deep would you dive to find that some thing which you cant leave behind?

NOW it is BS. :)